Last week we featured a pretty dank YouTube video which revealed details about the little-known Bugibba Temples (situated next to the Dolmen Hotel). Now, the man behind the video, Evan Hadfield a.k.a. Rare Earth, has gone and done it again by featuring the mythical Fungus Rock in his vlog. It goes without saying that his hilariously demure narration will blow anyone off their feet (pun intended). Can't quite keep up? Read on.
Fungus Rock, or il-Gebla tal-General as it is known amongst locals, is a small islet which is home to a flowering plant with medicinal properties – or so the Knights of Malta thought. A popular remedy at the time, it was so sought after that Grand Master Pinto ordered illegal trespassing on the islet to be punishable by up to three years as an oarsman with the Knights' fleet. The plant was often gifted to noblemen and honoured guests when visiting the Maltese Islands, but while officially used as a syptic dressing or cure for dysentery, the plant provided alternative assistance before wonderdrug Viagra ever came onto the market.
Evan attributes the link between the plant, Cynomorium, and its fabled properties to a man called Bohme, who, back in the day, had theorized that God loved humans to such an incredible extent that he purposefully designed plants to take the form of the organ they were meant to cure. This way, doctors would have an easier time administering the correct solution to any ailment. Despite the Cynomorium plant not looking particularly phallic, at least in modern terms, it seems to have qualified as so back in the times of the Knights. Evan has a lot to say about this: “I don’t know about you but my penis doesn’t start really thin and bulb out like a corndog,” he says, adding that “to the Maltese who had never seen an old-timey microphone, and probably had never eaten a corndog, this was a particularly phallic plant.”
If you'd like to know - or have a friend that needs to know - about a plant that is "an aphrodisiac, a contraceptive and stops STDs" then copy the link, forward it and take five out of your day to check out this top piece of content. The vlog is full of hilarious anecdotes balanced out with factual information, making for quite a fun approach to your everyday infomercial/a day in Malta video. We have one thing to say to you Evan, keep 'em coming!